The batteries on my life support died late last night. I was seriously lost. No Youtube. No Netflix. No Stan. NO TV!!!!! It would be laughable if I wasn't serious.
My TV runs 24/7 unless I am at my PC screen. The TV is my goto location. Any time I pause to think I end up on the couch, remote in one hand, snack in the other and a coke or coffee on the coffee table, doing the Youtube waltz. I quite like the mystery of falling asleep in front of a video about heavy machinery dredging a farm pond and waking some time later to "who knows what". Youtube has its own strange magic for connecting videos. I could wake to anything from home workshop metal manufacturing to the long term affects of deep space travel. It is irrelevant. It is just the white noise of my life. Like the ringing in my ears, I expect it to be there. When it wasn't I was mentally and physically disoriented. I had my drugs early because I knew I would sleep through the 8:00am alarm. I woke again at 10:30am and lay in my nest until 11:00. I am down to the baked beans on porridge conundrum but I did have two crusts in the fridge. Strawberry jam on toast plus coffee. Yes I have found a way back into coffee. I am using a much coarser grind so it isn't so strong/bitter. Toast at the bench, coffee at the desk. With a herculean effort of will power I took out the box that is supposed to have my battery stores. YES! I have 4 AAA batteries. Swap in two and my heart started beating again. I tested the TV. IT STILL WORKS!!! I am saved!!
I know this is not a healthy state of mind. I don't care. I have no purpose, no pride and no shame. How else could I put this admission of gross failure, irretrievably into the webmosphere. But that's Tony's World.